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Words To Live By
- "Wise choices often mean rough going." My uncle told me this last year when I was going through a difficult time, and he was absolutely correct: While I knew I'd made the best decision for myself, it didn't mean I had removed all obstacles. His words gave me hope and strength to continue.
- I was at work one day feeling depressed, and a legal assistant I work with (she was a Polish refugee) looked at me and said, "The only one who is going to take care of you is you." It was an aha moment. I think I was waiting for someone to step in and help me when really, no one was able to - or going to.
- "Let go or be dragged."
- Advice from the iVillage boards: "Our feelings may not be entirely in our control, but our responses are our choice. You have to choose to be happy, choose to be the bigger person, choose not to let someone impact your life in a negative way."
- "The only way out is through." It's a phrase that stuck in my mind throughout a bad breakup.
- After my husband's death, a church acquaintance wrote me a letter to say that her husband died at the same young age and under nearly identical circumstances. She then finished with, "I cannot imagine what you are going through." That filled me with the most incredible relief and warmth. Obviously she'd gone through the same thing, obviously she must have shared some of my own feelings, but she had the grace not to presume what they were.
- "Don't let people rent space in your head." It was an important realization for me at a time when I was really obsessing about my ex.
- "If a man tells you he doesn't know what he wants, he doesn't know what he's got."
- A quote that I have on my office wall and read daily: "You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down."
- My mother's mantra: "If the problem is something you cannot change, then you must change your attitude toward it."